From the EP Depending on the Light
BRIGHTER
I came a long way
To cry
To climb the highest mountain
I could find
And way up on a windswept, steep and stony ledge
I get to sleep up on a big high bed
And as winter slowly becomes spring
All my tears will have anointed everything
Higher, higher, higher
Higher and higher and higher
Now don’t think for a moment
I’ve forgotten you
So many nights my heart’s cried out
Just for you
But I don’t want to try and change you
Darlin I don’t blame you
You said you always knew, I’d fly away
And though winter’s bound to become spring
I cannot promise you anything
Lighter, lighter, lighter
Lighter and lighter and lighter
I came a long, long way
To cry
To walk alone
Along the Platte River side
And way out on a windswept, steep and stony ledge
I get to watch the sky turn pink and red
Brighter, brighter, brighter
Brighter and brighter and brighter …
© 2020 Jennifer Jane Niceley, BMI
TURN TO YOU
As the flower turns to fruit
I’ve turned away
I’ve turned to you
Now watch the days
Rush by again
Like water running from the dam
From the outside
Of the wide world
To the inside
Of the river bend
Still willing to try my hand again
Like sowing seeds in the wind —
It’s a long walk
From the valley
Twisting through strange countryside
Always something lost
Something found
On your way up to higher ground
Past the highway
There’s a freeway
It never sleeps, it never ends
You can drive straight to California
And wind up right back here again
As the flower turns to fruit
I’ve turned away
I’ve turned to you
Now watch the days
Rush by again
Still sowing seeds in the wind
© 2020 Jennifer Jane Niceley, BMI
DEPENDING ON THE LIGHT
The stakes are high
And getting higher
Each day the wheels are turning faster
I pay the price, the rising cost
With love and hunger, pain and wonder
I see you land on the valley floor
You fly away
You come back for more…
When you climb the mountain pass
Where sun and shadow collide
I have to close my eyes
Are we crossing —
Depending on the light?
Are you going, are you coming back
Depending on the light
The world is big
But it’s getting smaller
Can I hold you all night
Then a little longer
I promise we won’t have to feel bad
When you turn east
And I go west
Are we crossing
Depending on the light?
Are you going, are you coming back
Depending on the light
The stakes were high
And now they’re higher
Each day the stones are turning faster
I pay the price, the rising cost
With love and hunger, pain and wonder
© 2020 Jennifer Jane Niceley, BMI
TWO RAVENS
We drove slow
Through clouds of dust
Past red stones
And wildflowers
We walked down
To the Cottonwoods
Sat by a little sparkling stream
We watched two ravens
Fight the wind
Dance with the trembling leaves
I wanted love
So bad
I would have done
Almost anything
Cry of a hawk
In the distance
I saw
I saw it change direction
Now my heart remains
A storm cloud
On the plains —
Will my heart remain
A storm cloud
On the plains?
© 2020 Jennifer Jane Niceley, BMI
From the album Angels, Demons, Red-Tail Hawks
WING TO WING
Jennifer Jane Niceley
Is it true -- we've got to be alone
to be free?
Is it wrong to wonder
what it'd be like
to fly wing to wing --
There's a power in choosing words
There's a power in turning away
But out here at the edge of the sky
I've just got pictures in my mind ---
Well I may have smothered some seeds
in the ground, with tears and desire
And I may have let the darkness
of disappointment, nearly put out my fire
But each season has its own surprises
And the storm clouds might just
give way to the sun --
Am I crazy
again
Or am I just
human?
CHILD OF GOD
Jennifer Jane Niceley
I went back home again
I was looking for something
I was running from the world
I was seeking comfort
I went back to the beginning
I went back to my roots
I went back to the land
of bitter fruit ---
And I know I should've known better
than to look so long, in vain
I just kept walking in circles
through the fog, and the rain --
Through the fog, and the rain.
There's fire and there's water
And sometimes you've got to choose
What is your heart's true desire
What are you not willing to lose --
I hear voices on the wind
They're saying Wake up from the dream -
They're saying You are a child of God --
You were born free -
You were born free -
DESERT PLAIN
Jennifer Jane Niceley
To dwell on the border
can be a way of life
Borders keep changing
so you learn to travel light --
And if you meet another out there
who matches your flame
Full of tender desire and no promises to break -
You just take what you need
And you give what you can
And you rest for a moment, in the language
you know you both best understand --
Stranger, like a brother, like a lover, like a friend
Stranger, like a brother, like a lover, like a friend ---
When you've walked through fire
only the core of you remains
A wide open heart can become
a desert plain -
But what if we just let love fall down on us
like a gentle rain -
Give those flowers forgotten there
a chance to bloom again
Give those flowers forgotten there
brand new names --
Stranger, like a brother, like a lover, like a friend
Stranger, like a brother, like a lover, like a friend
HIDDEN GEMS
Jennifer Jane Niceley
Strands of sunlight falling through
tangled Cedar limbs
Always a door just in view
I know I must open --
Walking through a pink sky
Leaving the past behind
Things I thought were standing still
have been moving all this time
Beyond the walls, beyond the wars
Beyond the scars, beyond words ---
What if love's just an intersection
on our journey as souls?
What if I only have more questions
when I get to where I'm going --
Sounds of water passing over
stacks of ancient stones
Remember no matter how it seems,
we're never all alone --
Beyond the walls, beyond the wars
Beyond the scars, beyond words
I'll be using my night vision
Still looking for
hidden gems
DOG STAR
Jennifer Jane Niceley
Will the Dog Star come back to us?
In its proper season, time and place
Will the locusts sing their wild lullaby
just as sure as night follows day?
Will I step out of my silence
Will I walk into the chaos
Will I let myself look beyond the loss --
Maybe like a river seeking
the limits of the land
We don't remember the beginning
and forget about the end --
Wonder where love will lead me now
Wonder where love will lead me now
Wonder where love will lead me now
Wonder where love will lead me now
HIGHER POWER
Jennifer Jane Niceley
When you break apart
you break open
Doesn't have to mean
you're broken --
Put my faith in a higher power
Found the nucleus of my desire
Learned you can't transmute it
til you've owned it, first --
And the crows drop from the trees
Into endless, fields of green
I accept the beauty
I accept the pain
Will that mean someday
I'll be free?
And the crows drop from the trees
Into endless, fields of green
MOUNTAIN SPRING
Jennifer Jane Niceley
Bubbling from the mountain spring
old wounds, new love
Shifting in the dying light
will I recognize my reflection?
Cut away, cut away
see what I've become
Don't look away, don't look away
from what's been done --
It's never over, it's never enough
We're just layer, upon layer of love ---
Dancing in the winter fire
old dreams, new visions
Angels, demons, red-tail hawks
keep on circling the roads unchosen --
A sister told me, she said sometimes
to find your way back out again
you gotta go deeper, you gotta go further in --
It never ends, it never ends, it's never enough
We're just layer, upon layer of love
We're just layer upon layer of love ---
ANOTHER COUNTRY
Jennifer Jane Niceley
There's been something beautifully fierce
about our love so far
The lows have sunk me deeper, the highs have let me soar
And I know if you could you'd help me find what I'm still looking for --
Now is this where life meets art
at the crossing of our hearts
Where the dawning day lights up
two paths, instead of one
And when you hold me tight, it's like being in another country
When you let me go, will you let me cross the ocean --
Is it wrong, is it right
the broken wing still tries to fly
And in the shadows of time passing
what will we choose to see?
Wild geese in flight, or the owl at night
Wild geese in flight, or the owl at night --
They say matter follows spirit
there is no other way
And the river shapes the land
by what it takes away --
When you hold me tight, it's like being in another country
When you let me go, will you let me cross the ocean
~~~
From the album BIRDLIGHT
NIGHTBIRD
Jennifer Niceley
Let the Nightbird sing
Let the Nightbird sing
Just beyond the windowpane
I believed in what I couldn't see
Now here you stand before me --
What do I do with this key in my hand?
Hard not to give you my power
When I come down will I miss the view
From my lonely tower...
Let the Nightbird sing
Let the Nightbird sing
Wait for what the new day brings --
Let the Nightbird sing
Let the Nightbird sing
I'll fall back into the mystery
The air has changed, the winds are moving fast
I turn my face away from the past
Would you walk, would you walk with me
Through these forbidden gardens --
Are you willing to really seek
Such illuminations...
Let the Nightbird sing--
Guide me to the land of my dreams
Wonder will you come with me
Can you hear the Nightbird sing?
GHOSTS
Jennifer Niceley
Sweat mixed with rain, tears
A few things remain
untamed
Caught walking in a field
I cannot claim
Beyond the claims
of love
Oh the bonds of love…
Watching the water rise
Dammed up river rolling by
Released, running fast
Picking up pieces of our past —
***
When something small gets lost
And it goes unnoticed
What does it do
to the bigger balance?
There’s the invisible
Over here’s the vanished
There must be ghosts
all around us…
Watching the water rise
Dammed up river rolling by
Released, running fast
Picking up pieces of our past —
Sweat mixed with rain, tears,
A few things remain untamed
LAND I LOVE
Jennifer Niceley
Standing on a hill
I see so many things
Crow in the field
Hawk in the tree
Fox on the bluff, on the run
Deer in the wood
Sun coming up
Land I love
Standing in the river
I see so many things
Reflections on the water
Worlds I cannot reach
One move and the fish all slip
Quick into the black
Reminds me of so many things
That are never coming back
Standing on, standing on
the solid earth
For better, for worse
No promise of return—
In a dream I see everything lost
Nothing left
But the love that was felt
WHAT WILD
Jennifer Niceley
What wild is left keeps coming in
What wild is left keeps coming in
It’s summertime in Tennessee
And the vines and weeds own everything
Coming up from the cracks in the concrete
Standing tall beside abandoned buildings--
Rain, rain, rain, makes them stronger
Come a drought and none will last longer
Trumpet, Passion, Love, Honeysuckle vines
Pokeweed, Chickweed, Thistle, Dandelion
What wild is left keeps coming in
What wild is left keeps coming in
I see them filling up the ditches
All along the railroad tracks
In little forgotten corners
Among beer cans and plastic bags
They just climb over fences, squeeze through the sidewalk
Pay no attention to our little lines
All our little laws---
Makes me think about you and me
We’re trying to stay strong, we’re trying to live free
Gotta keep our hearts full of love
Let our souls shine no matter what
Say what we’ve got to say and let the world look away
If it must —
What wild is left
keeps coming in
GOODBYE KISS
Jennifer Niceley
When did you learn
life can be savage, and unfair
When did you learn
no number of tears
can bring back the lost lamb?
When did you learn
not every fallen feather
needs to be gathered…
When did you learn
although the road goes on somewhere
you don’t have to take it there —-
Well I wish I’d learned
long before this
Every breaking morn
arrives like a goodbye kiss …
Songs from the East
Birds I cannot name
bringing in a new day--
See how the creatures
seem to just carry on
in the face of so much lost
Well I wish I’d learned
long before this
Every breaking morn arrives now
like a goodbye kiss —
Unanswered questions
Unfinished visions
keep hanging around like fog
in the trees —-
STRANGE TIMES
Jennifer Niceley
Twisting river still cradling
this whole valley, all our vanities
Idle hands, vanished dreams
Paving over flowers and graves
Garbage settles between the hills
It’s okay, it’s how we live
In these strange times
In these strange times
Leaning against a Poplar tree
In a small, important wood
Animal tracks around me
Grace is what they say God gives
But will we remember to ask
Or just remain
bewildered
In these strange times
In these strange times
Surely the wind will continue to moan
for those who have lost
what will never be found —-
******
From the EP Body + Soul
One
Jennifer Niceley
One wanted to be two
Two wanted to be one
Came with the morning dew
Flew with the setting sun
So I erase the records and the roads
From my body and my soul
Lost to you now
forever
Like a question
never answered
But things still matter like love
in this world
Oh even if everything ends—
Things still matter
like love in this world
And I’d do it, all over again
EARTHLY LOVE
Jennifer Niceley
The bee and the flower go together
Just like the bat and the dark
The seam that God has woven for the world,
we're tearing it apart---
But covered in the mist that comes
up from the summer storm
I'm casting my luck on this land,
I've opened my door ---
Oh Earthly Love
You know that big red sun is coming up
But there's a west wind, following us
It's gonna blow away
Every trace of us
The seed and the sparrow
Snake skin in the grass
The deer and the arrow
None of us none of none of us---
Nothing's here to last
Oh Earthly Love
I see that big, red sun coming up
But there's a west wind, following us
It's gonna blow away
Every trace
NOT LEAVING THIS TIME
Jennifer Niceley
So many hours lost to the fuss
Flowers and animals know better than us
Standing at the gate
With my heart opened up---
I'm not leaving this time
Winter comes with its ice and its gray
Dreams of Spring won't shorten the wait
Feels like everything's slipping away
But I'm not leaving this time
I'm not leaving this time
I'm not leaving this time
The wind will carry my fever away
I'm not leaving this time
SLEEPWALKING
Jennifer Niceley
In the morning light the spider webs
glow from the hills
And the fog will take its time to rise
from the river and the fields--
It's the soil, it's the air
It's the sky looked at, from exactly there...
I was just sleepwalking
through the world
Until I found my way back home
All my dreams were dreams of you
Your slopes, your groves, your twisted roots
Til I slept again, in solitude,
among your beauty
among your wounds--
And the time I was trying
to run so free
You were beckoning, "come,
tend to me"
I was just sleepwalking
through the world
Until I found my way back home
****
From the album Luminous
A LITTLE MORE
Jennifer Niceley
Sitting in this empty house
looking out, at the trembling leaves
I love to hear
the cicadas sing--
But somehow that bright, white,
late-afternoon sun looks like
It don't want to give, nothing
to no one
But all I've been asking
All I've been asking for
Is a little more,
a little more--
It's a wonder we can hear the freight train
when it blows
There's so much new noise
in the air
Sometimes I start to feel
I start to feel old
Wishing things would slow down,
just slow down
And all I've been asking
All I've been asking more
Is a little more
a little more
a little more
SHADOWS AND MOUNTAINS
Jennifer Niceley
For him
she sacrificed her visions
Like a lioness, laying down her strength
In the name of love
and passion
She's given up most everything
What sad quest
has this been
She asks, looking back
What endless night
without stars
Trying to make his eyes
a mirror
Now she's standing by the lake
looking in
Searching for herself
again
She remembers
as a little girl
Feeling just like
a rising star
Who knows where it was
along the way
But somehow something got
rearranged
Now she's standing by the lake
looking in
Searching for herself
again --
Last night she went driving in the rain
Said she needed time to think
Streetlights turned into starlight
She just kept on going straight
Into the shadows
and mountains
Shadows and mountains
Shadows and mountains
all around
BEAUTIFUL
Jennifer Niceley
All dolled up
Little girl's grown up now
Feeling tough
Longing for that deeper cut--
All the lights of the city
And the stars up in the sky
Cannot compare tonight
To the desire in her eyes
Oh you know it's hard to walk
But it's easy to run
Down the dark back alley
of love
He said let's take a drive
get out of town
Going fast, with the windows down
She had honeysuckle vine
twisted all around her mind--
And just like the orchid flower grows
better in the shadows
There were things she would just let be
Call it the cost of living free
Oh you know it's hard to walk
but its easy to run
It's hard to walk
but its easy to run
Down the dark backroads
looking for love
Past the bones in the ditch
sun-bleached, half hidden now
by the leaves
fresh from falling --
On to the fence laying down
by the path, half overgrown
that leads to the quarry
She was feeling good
until something in the reflection in the glass
made her wonder:
Am I beautiful?
Am I beautiful?
Am I beautiful?
DARK EYES
Jennifer Niceley
Grew up singing underground
Drifting off every night
to those sad, faraway sounds--
I spent so much time
spent so much of life
dreaming of the sunlight
instead of just
feeling it
Dark eyes, dark eyes
Do you still like
what you see?
Dark eyes, dark eyes
will you wait just a little longer
for me?
When I was a little girl
I walked right up
to the alter
I put out my heart out, gave it away
wanting so bad to believe--
Something about that scene
oh that little church
in the country
You know it still haunts my dreams
Dark eyes, dark eyes
Oh when will we remember
how to fly
Dark eyes, dark eyes
I'm gonna do it, I'm gonna do it
Nothing can stop me--
this time
STRANGE ANIMAL
Jennifer Niceley
I was always destined
to love you
I knew it when I saw the winter
in your eyes--
I wondered
could we
Oh could we keep each other warm
And now here you are asleep
so peacefully beside me
But you're still somehow like a
strange animal
Oh I know I might never know
you completely
But I dare to love you
this deeply
Is it just another part
of the heart's bravery?
Bravery --
SYCAMORE TREE
Jennifer Niceley
There's a bank where the cedars and the sumac grow
They know, they know, they know
Wherever I go, whatever I follow
a part of me never leaves there
A part of me is always breathing
that river air
Oh the long afternoon
so still and quiet
stirred only by the hawk's lonely cry
so still and quiet
oh the long afternoon
Oceanic night
the sky's alive
the sky's on fire
Oceanic night
the moon shows all her scars
it's so clear and bright
Oceanic night
Hear the water over the stones
Hear the water over the stones
Hear the water over the stones
Under the Sycamore tree
giant, saintly
under the Sycamore tree
you begin to blend into things
you begin to blend into things
under the Sycamore tree
Holding on to a dream
Holding on to a dream
Holding on to a dream
NIGHTWALK
Jennifer Niceley
We can walk
as far as we want
We can walk and walk
The day's almost over
We can walk and walk
Past the horses in the pasture
Running wild, like they're still free
Like there's no fences around them
No boundaries--
And we can go to the end of the bend
Through the twisted trees
With the herons flying above us
In their slow, silent mystery
I want be
like that
I want to feel
like that
I want to see the world
like that
And we can go as far as we want
Into the dark
Forget where we are
Forget who we are
And when we see the deer cross before us
One stops, to look at us
You can almost see through it
It moves
like a dream--
I want to be
like that
I want to feel like that
I want to see the world
like that
LUMINOUS
Jennifer Niceley
Don't say a word
Don't say a word
I just want to gaze into your eyes
tonight
Wouldn't it be nice
tonight
to sleep out on the grass
It's been such a long day
in this world
We could lie out under the stars
Remember just how luminous
we are
But don't say a word
Don't say a word
Don't say a word